Last Thursday, I auditioned for the TV game show Trivial Pursuit: America Plays. It was just one of those things I saw on Craigslist. And I thought, what’s the point of being a freelance writer if you don’t take every opportunity to do random things that people with full-time jobs can’t do? So I did it.
I’d never been on a real studio lot before. It was exactly the way I imagined it to be. A lady guarding the entrance. Lots of trailers. The smell of fame and fortune. Some guy in the parking lot asked me for directions to the audition. But he was auditioning for Hannah Montana. Crazy. Hollywoodland is real.
Two kids in charge led my group of contestants in single-file lines all around the place. Major kindergarten flashback, and I wondered if they were making us do extra walking just for the power trip.
Then we had to take a written trivia test. I failed. The obnoxious girl sitting next to me in spandex pants passed. Oh the shame. Really, it was shocking. I never fail things that involve smarts. I would give excuses, but a confidentiality agreement keeps me from saying more.
But this show gives the best revenge. All the losers got to meet the producer and come up with game show questions. What’s a cheap way to avoid paying writers is also a way for me to win money. If annoying spandex girl gets my questions wrong, I win her money. Wha-ha-ha-ha!